ST Forum: Transsexuals: More Understanding Needed (Sept 12 2008)

Sep 12, 2008

Transsexuals: More understanding needed

KUDOS to the transsexuals in Mr Wong Kim Hoh's Special Report last
Saturday, 'When Papa became Mama'. Having had enough just trying to
understand themselves, they have come forward to help the rest of us
understand our problem with them. And indeed the problem lies with us.
I read with sadness of the rejection, discrimination and struggles the
transsexual community has had to endure, and realise it is our
under-developed understanding of the diversity and complexity of human
genders, our immature stereotyping of those who are different, and our
lack of acceptance and compassion for the unique individuality of our
children, that have caused their plight. They are just as much a part
of our family. What has happened to our focus on family values? Values
of unconditional love, support and commitment?

How can we undo the damage we have done?

Could the answer lie in the poignant reply of the 10-year old daughter
of male-to-female transsexual Fanny Ler? When asked what it was like
to have two mothers, she said: 'It's okay to have two mummies. I can
still enjoy both their love.' This turns the family-values argument on
its head. It is not non-traditional family structures that constitute
a threat to families, but the shame and stigma society attaches to
families that undermine it. It is perhaps true then, that 'a little
child shall lead us' to truly pledge ourselves to be one united
people, regardless of race, language, religion, gender identity or
sexual orientation. A society based on justice and true equality for all.

Susan Tang (Mrs)

Founding member

SAFE (a support group of straight people aimed at accepting gay,
lesbians and people of other sexual orientations)

ST: Transsexuals: More Understanding Needed (Sept 12)

Sep 12, 2008
Transsexuals: More understanding needed
KUDOS to the transsexuals in Mr Wong Kim Hoh's Special Report last
Saturday, 'When Papa became Mama'. Having had enough just trying to
understand themselves, they have come forward to help the rest of us
understand our problem with them. And indeed the problem lies with us.

I read with sadness of the rejection, discrimination and struggles the
transsexual community has had to endure, and realise it is our
under-developed understanding of the diversity and complexity of human
genders, our immature stereotyping of those who are different, and our
lack of acceptance and compassion for the unique individuality of our
children, that have caused their plight. They are just as much a part
of our family. What has happened to our focus on family values? Values
of unconditional love, support and commitment?

How can we undo the damage we have done?

Could the answer lie in the poignant reply of the 10-year old daughter
of male-to-female transsexual Fanny Ler? When asked what it was like
to have two mothers, she said: 'It's okay to have two mummies. I can
still enjoy both their love.' This turns the family-values argument on
its head. It is not non-traditional family structures that constitute
a threat to families, but the shame and stigma society attaches to
families that undermine it. It is perhaps true then, that 'a little
child shall lead us' to truly pledge ourselves to be one united
people, regardless of race, language, religion, gender identity or
sexual orientation. A society based on justice and true equality for all.

Susan Tang (Mrs)

Founding member

SAFE (a support group of straight people aimed at accepting gay,
lesbians and people of other sexual orientations)

http://www.straitstimes.com/ST%2BForum/Online%2BStory/STIStory_277552.html

AsiaOne: When Papa became Mama (Sept 8 2008)

When Papa became Mama

When Frankie first told his friends that he was changing his name to Fanny, most were stunned that he was going to change his sex.
Wong Kim Hoh

Mon, Sep 08, 2008
The Straits Times

TWO months ago, a former first sergeant who served 10 years in the Singapore navy sent a mass SMS to all his friends.

It said: 'Dear friends, I have changed my name from Frankie to Fanny.'

Some laughed it off as a prank. Others called up Frankie Ler, 34, and were stunned when he told them he had decided to become a woman.

The divorcee and father of a 10-year-old girl told them he had started 'transitioning': He had grown his hair, was taking female hormone pills, and had begun wearing women's clothes.

'I didn't want them to get a shock if they bumped into me on the street,' said the administrative assistant, sitting in a Rowell Road Cafe with her daughter.

Her face is powdered, and she is wearing light eyeshadow and lipstick. Her broad shoulders fill out a conservative black blouse which she complements with a knee-length patterned skirt and sensible pumps.

Half an hour earlier, Fanny was the main 'attraction' at My Wife, My Kids, one of several events in this year's IndigNation - the local gay community's annual pride season.

Facing an inquisitive audience of more than 60 people, she explained why she had to change sex so late in life, after marriage and fatherhood.

Fanny - who has a younger sister - claims her transsexualism surfaced only last year. Her late father was a factory worker, her mother, now 56, is a retired washerwoman.

'I never thought I had any problems, I just thought I had an abnormal hobby,' she says in a mixture of English and Mandarin. That hobby was a penchant for dressing in women's clothes. She discovered she liked it while trying on her mother's clothes at 10, and continued to furtively cross-dress until she got married at 23.

The Yio Chu Kang Secondary School alumnus - who signed up with the navy after a brief stint as a security guard - met and fell in love with her wife on an Internet chatline.

They got married three months later. Their daughter was born the following year. 'Just before I got married, I threw out all the shoes and dresses I had bought over the years. We were a very normal couple during our marriage. I was not gay and I did not have any interest in men,' says Fanny.

The marriage broke up seven years later in 2004. The couple have joint custody of their daughter.

'We just drifted apart. It had nothing to do with cross-dressing,' she says.

One day in June last year, she typed 'men who love to dress up as women' in Google. The search engine threw up many links, one of which led to sgbutterfly.org - a resource site for local transsexuals.

She trawled through the site's many articles and discussion threads, and even posted questions, on transsexual issues - from identity struggles to hormone treatments and make-up tips. 'I was so happy. I finally found the answers to so many of the questions in my head,' she says.

Two months later, after she was convinced that she was a woman trapped in a man's body, she spoke to the person closest to her: her daughter.

'I wanted to be a woman but I had to be sure it wouldn't hurt my daughter. So I decided to ask, not tell, her if I should transit. If she had said no, I wouldn't have done this.'

The Primary 4 pupil (whom we are not naming to protect her identity) says she was 'a little bit surprised that he should ask this question'. Fanny carefully explained what she was going through and why she felt the way she did.

The precocious little girl gave her approval. 'His physical looks will change but he is still my father. He has always been very caring, and is always teaching me to be brave,' she says, adding that she has told two of her closest friends but sworn them to secrecy.

Fanny felt a big load taken off her shoulders. 'My mind was very clear. I was divorced and I've been given a second chance to live my life right.'

She went for psychiatric evaluation which confirmed she had gender identity disorder (GID). She started her hormonal therapy late last year. Her sister, parents and friends were told next. They were shocked but took it well save for just one friend who has cut off all contact.

The last to know was her former wife.

'She was very upset but I explained that I found it hardest to tell her because we had such a close relationship,' says Fanny who plans to have her operation in Singapore next year.

'To her credit, she joined sgbutterfly to try and understand why I had to do this,' says Fanny, who adds that the former spouse occasionally takes her shopping for women's clothes.

Fanny happily lets on that she recently found a job in a construction firm. Her boss and her colleagues are aware of her status.

She does not harbour grand plans such as marriage for the future. 'I just want to focus on my daughter.'

The latter ponders when asked what it's like to have two mothers. 'It's okay to have two mummies. I can still enjoy both their love.'

This article was first published in The Straits Times on Sept 6, 2008.

ST Saturday Special Report - Once a Tourist Attraction, She is Now a Tai Tai (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
transformed
Once a tourist attraction, she is now a tai-tai
FACE TO FACE WITH... SELVI WIDMER, ex-Bugis Street transsexual
By Wong Kim Hoh
HER long tresses are swept up in a stately bun and threaded with
elaborate hairpins and strands of jasmine.

She wears a silk sari in a majestic shade of jade and an aubergine
blouse with gold trimmings.

On her neck hang three necklaces - her thick gold wedding thali, a
string of pearls, and a $42,000 choker studded with pearls, rubies and
diamonds.

It may be an outing to the temple but it is also an opportunity for
Selvi Widmer, 49, to mark her standing as a respected elder in the
Indian transsexual community.

She has come a long way from her dancing days in the 1970s and 1980s.
Then, the ebony-skinned, long-limbed transsexual was - along with
scores of exotic transwomen - a tourist attraction at the infamous
Bugis Street.

The exotic nightspot was torn down to make way for urban redevelopment
in the mid-1980s.

'They used to call me Miss Black Beauty. I would dress up in mini
skirts and hot pants, wear high heels and tourists - ang moh, Japanese
- would pay $20 to take a picture with me,' she recalls coquettishly.

'Eh, we were famous, you know, long before the Thais,' she says,
lamenting how Thailand's transwomen have since superseded their
Singaporean counterparts in the fame stakes.

Selvi was born the only son of a Public Works Department foreman and a
housewife, who had three daughters.

Selvi says that from young, she knew Mother Nature had made a mistake
with her. Her late father would hit her to make her mend her feminine
ways.

After completing Primary 6 at Newton Boys' Primary School, she ran
away from home.

'I wanted to be a woman but since I couldn't be one at home, I decided
I would live on my own,' she says.

She bunked in with other transsexuals in a room in Little India,
paying the $3 daily rent with money she earned as a worker in sari
shops and factories.

From her group of 'sisters', she learnt how to take hormone pills,
grow out her hair, dress up and apply make-up.

Visits to several psychiatrists when she was 17 confirmed for her that
she was indeed a woman born with the wrong body.

She started dancing in Bugis Street to earn money for the operation.
The money was easy.

She claims she did not need to sleep with men then.

'I could make $200 a night, just dancing and posing for photos. That
was nearly $6,000 a month, a lot of money in those days,' says Selvi,
adding that she often helped her family out with her earnings.

A German tourist told her she could make a lot of money dancing in
Europe. Being young and fearless, she did just that.

She worked as an exotic dancer in many European cities, and at 19, she
had saved enough for her operation - which cost her $19,000 at
Gleneagles Hospital.

'My mother had to sign the form for me, I was underaged then. She also
looked after me when I was recuperating,' she says, adding that she
reconciled with her estranged father two years before he died in 1981.

She continued performing in Europe for many years after her operation.

It was while dancing in a club in Locarno, Switzerland, that she met
her realtor husband, now retired, in 1988.

'I told him only three years after meeting him. I thought I had better
tell him, especially since he has a gun, a real gun,' she says with a
loud cackle.

He took it well. 'He told me not to talk about the past. He also said
I didn't look like a transsexual.

'He's a simple man who loves my traditional ways and only insists that
I dress up in saris and carry myself well,' says Selvi, who now speaks
German fluently.

Now 78, Mr Hans Walter Widmer also paid for his wife to attend several
make-up and beauty courses, and even opened a boutique for her in
Singapore. Unfortunately, the business did not take off.

The couple have three homes - one in Wintherthur (a bustling city just
18 minutes by train from Zurich), one in Locarno and one up in the
Alps. They also have a three-room HDB flat in Ang Mo Kio, where she
stays when she comes home for her annual holidays.

'What more can a woman want? I have seen the world three times,' says
Selvi, showing pictures of her with her husband in Egypt, Paris and
other exotic locations.

Brassy, well-spoken and charismatic, she also makes yearly pilgrimages
to India where she has many friends in the hijra or transgendered
community.

Quite the tai-tai, but she has not forgotten her local sisters.

In 1986, she set up an association called the Hijadah Pan with a
fellow transsexual from Malaysia.

Functioning like a social network, it rallies members - who number
several hundreds in both countries - for both happy and sad occasions
like weddings, operations and funerals.

'We are all blood sisters, we need to help each other.'

kimhoh@sph.com.sg

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275763.html

ST Saturday Special Report - Face to Face (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
transformed
He decided against operation
FACE TO FACE WITH... KRIS H, counsellor
FOR six years in the 1990s, Kris H, 39 walked the streets, offering
sex while dressed in women's clothes.

He charged between $30 and $300 during the 1990s in red light areas in
Kuala Lumpur and Singapore.

The sixth of nine children of a railway officer and a housewife, he
used to endure beatings as a child from his father and two elder
brothers for being effeminate.

At 12, he was sexually abused by an adult he knew.

He befriended a group of transsexual and transvestite sex workers
while doing an electrical engineering course after his O levels.

Before long, he was taking hormones and wearing dresses. When they
found out, his brothers threw him out of the house.

Left to fend for himself, he became a sex worker. In his 20s and known
as Sheela, he started saving up to go for sex reassignment surgery (SRS).

He also had a three-year relationship which ended when the man left
him for a woman. Heartbroken, he decided to go for the sex operation,
but a friend hauled him to a counsellor instead.

The counsellor asked him if he was sure, telling him that a sex
operation would not magically change his life.

Dr Calvin Fones, consultant psychiatrist at Gleneagles Medical Centre,
says he has seen several patients who have regretted changing sex.

'Quite often, these are people who have experienced failed
relationships. They latch on to the idea that the operation would
totally change their lives and solve all their relationship woes.

'It won't. And they can't go back; SRS is totally irreversible.'

Indeed, research has shown that many transsexuals become depressed and
suicidal because they cannot cope with many post-operative challenges.
In Malaysia, where Kris lives, these include the inability to change
their civil status, to marry a person of the opposite sex or to adopt
a child.

After several soul-searching sessions, Kris abandoned the idea.

Determined to leave his old world behind, he took up a course in
counselling and became a coordinator with Wake, the Women and Health
Association of Kuala Lumpur.

He now presents himself as a male and counsels people afflicted with
Aids, as well as transsexuals.

Having come from the streets himself, he is passionate about steering
transwomen from the sex trade.

Kris says: 'Some do it for survival, others because they like sex and
that's the only way they can meet men who want them and make money at
the same time.'

And there are also those who want to cling to their boyfriends or
husbands who are their pimps.

'Unfortunately, at least 80 per cent of these relationships never last
because these men just want their money and will leave them for real
women.'

In private, Kris still occasionally puts on dresses and make up. 'I am
who I am,' he says resignedly.

WONG KIM HOH

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275762.html

ST Saturday Special Report - When Papa Became Mama (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
transformed
When Papa became Mama
FACE TO FACE WITH... FANNY LER, ex-navy sergeant
TWO months ago, a former first sergeant who served 10 years in the
Singapore navy sent a mass SMS to all his friends.

It said: 'Dear friends, I have changed my name from Frankie to Fanny.'

Some laughed it off as a prank. Others called up Frankie Ler, 34, and
were stunned when he told them he had decided to become a woman.

The divorcee and father of a 10-year-old girl told them he had started
'transitioning': He had grown his hair, was taking female hormone
pills, and had begun wearing women's clothes.

'I didn't want them to get a shock if they bumped into me on the
street,' said the administrative assistant, sitting in a Rowell Road
Cafe with her daughter.

Her face is powdered, and she is wearing light eyeshadow and lipstick.
Her broad shoulders fill out a conservative black blouse which she
complements with a knee-length patterned skirt and sensible pumps.

Half an hour earlier, Fanny was the main 'attraction' at My Wife, My
Kids, one of several events in this year's IndigNation - the local gay
community's annual pride season.

Facing an inquisitive audience of more than 60 people, she explained
why she had to change sex so late in life, after marriage and fatherhood.

Fanny - who has a younger sister - claims her transsexualism surfaced
only last year. Her late father was a factory worker, her mother, now
56, is a retired washerwoman.

'I never thought I had any problems, I just thought I had an abnormal
hobby,' she says in a mixture of English and Mandarin. That hobby was
a penchant for dressing in women's clothes. She discovered she liked
it while trying on her mother's clothes at 10, and continued to
furtively cross-dress until she got married at 23.

The Yio Chu Kang Secondary School alumnus - who signed up with the
navy after a brief stint as a security guard - met and fell in love
with her wife on an Internet chatline.

They got married three months later. Their daughter was born the
following year. 'Just before I got married, I threw out all the shoes
and dresses I had bought over the years. We were a very normal couple
during our marriage. I was not gay and I did not have any interest in
men,' says Fanny.

The marriage broke up seven years later in 2004. The couple have joint
custody of their daughter.

'We just drifted apart. It had nothing to do with cross-dressing,' she
says.

One day in June last year, she typed 'men who love to dress up as
women' in Google. The search engine threw up many links, one of which
led to sgbutterfly.org - a resource site for local transsexuals.

She trawled through the site's many articles and discussion threads,
and even posted questions, on transsexual issues - from identity
struggles to hormone treatments and make-up tips. 'I was so happy. I
finally found the answers to so many of the questions in my head,' she
says.

Two months later, after she was convinced that she was a woman trapped
in a man's body, she spoke to the person closest to her: her daughter.

'I wanted to be a woman but I had to be sure it wouldn't hurt my
daughter. So I decided to ask, not tell, her if I should transit. If
she had said no, I wouldn't have done this.'

The Primary 4 pupil (whom we are not naming to protect her identity)
says she was 'a little bit surprised that he should ask this
question'. Fanny carefully explained what she was going through and
why she felt the way she did.

The precocious little girl gave her approval. 'His physical looks will
change but he is still my father. He has always been very caring, and
is always teaching me to be brave,' she says, adding that she has told
two of her closest friends but sworn them to secrecy.

Fanny felt a big load taken off her shoulders. 'My mind was very
clear. I was divorced and I've been given a second chance to live my
life right.'

She went for psychiatric evaluation which confirmed she had gender
identity disorder (GID). She started her hormonal therapy late last
year. Her sister, parents and friends were told next. They were
shocked but took it well save for just one friend who has cut off all
contact.

The last to know was her former wife.

'She was very upset but I explained that I found it hardest to tell
her because we had such a close relationship,' says Fanny who plans to
have her operation in Singapore next year.

'To her credit, she joined sgbutterfly to try and understand why I had
to do this,' says Fanny, who adds that the former spouse occasionally
takes her shopping for women's clothes.

Fanny happily lets on that she recently found a job in a construction
firm. Her boss and her colleagues are aware of her status.

She does not harbour grand plans such as marriage for the future. 'I
just want to focus on my daughter.'

The latter ponders when asked what it's like to have two mothers.
'It's okay to have two mummies. I can still enjoy both their love.'

WONG KIM HOH

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275759.html

ST Saturday Special Report - Why He Set Up Portal For 'Sisters' (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
Why he set up portal for 'sisters'
No sleaze, please. Straight guy just wants to give transsexual
community a space for bonding
By Wong Kim Hoh
DANIEL Kaw deflates expectations of how a champion for Singapore's
transsexual community should look.

The 36-year-old assistant project manager with a water engineering
firm is stocky and burly. Not surprising, since he is a lion dancer
and a certified wushu instructor.

Despite the ponytail, he is also 100 per cent male, straight and
married. And a father to boot.

So why did he set up sgbutterfly.org, Singapore's only Web portal for
the transgendered community in Singapore?

He grins as he sips his iced coffee in an Orchard Road cafe.

'Why do you do charity?' he volleys back.

'People think it costs a lot of money to host a Web portal. It
doesn't, it costs me just $10 a month,' says Mr Kaw, who studied
industrial electronics at the Japan-Singapore Technical Institute.

However, the youngest of three children of a businessman and a
housewife forks out more than just money. He invests at least four
hours daily to make sure the portal - which will celebrate its third
anniversary next month - runs smoothly.

The portal has - among other features - news clippings, discussion
forums and resource lists on transgender issues.

Its membership has grown from about 500 in the first year to about
1,600 now, and the site attracts between 40,000 and 80,000 hits a month.

Mr Kaw - who works on the site with three other volunteer moderators -
also organises monthly outings for its members, as well as talks to
raise awareness of transsexual issues.

His first encounter with a transsexual took place on an IRC channel
called Singapore 30something more than 10 years ago.

'Her name was Victoria, and she was very open about who she was and
the issues she faced,' he recalls.

Intrigued, he started talking to others on the Internet. He even met
some of them.

He explains his fascination: 'They are human. Like everyone else, they
want to live a normal life.'

He is used to people questioning his intentions.

'Even my wife, who knows what I do, once asked me if I was transsexual
myself,' he says with a laugh.

'But she's supportive and has even met some of them,' adds Mr Kaw, who
declines to reveal more about his family in order to protect their
privacy.

The martial arts exponent decided that he would set up a Web portal
for his 'sisters', the way he did for wushu and lion dance fans a few
years earlier with sgwutan.com.

He started discussing the idea with his transsexual friends, including
outspoken activist Leona Lo.

While there are several sites frequented by transgendered prostitutes
for sexual hook-ups, there was none which properly addressed the
issues the community faces or gave its members a space to bond and
socialise.

'Before I set up the site, I spent at least four hours nightly over
three months reading up on transsexualism issues,' says Mr Kaw,
reeling off the names of world-renowned experts and researchers in the
area such as American computer scientist Lyn Conway, and Associate
Professor Sam Winter from the University of Hong Kong.

It was not all smooth sailing.

'I spent a lot of time initially throwing out and banning people who
thought it was a sleazy 'ladyboy' sex portal,' he recalls grimly.

The portal has settled into a smooth groove now. A visit to the forums
shows spirited, well-articulated discussions on issues such as whether
transsexuals should pursue activism.

The founder observes: 'The focus of the portal has changed. When we
started, we wanted to build awareness. Now, we want to reach out to
the community.'

That's why he started monthly outings.

'I hope these outings will send out the message that they are not alone.'

Held mostly at Newton Hawker Centre or coffee shops around town, these
excursions attract between five and 25 people.

'We occupied almost six tables at Starbucks in Plaza Singapura on one
such outing last year,' says Mr Kaw, adding that one member wrestling
with his sexual identity even took along his mother.

Mr Kaw and members of the portal will be celebrating its third
anniversary next month with a party at a yet-to-be-confirmed venue.

The unlikely activist is gratified to see more new members coming into
sgbutterfly.org to ask more questions.

As a moderator, there is one principle he abides by.

'I do not help them make decisions. I do not tell them if they should
go for sex reassignment surgery, I also do not tell them if they are
transsexuals or not.

'Those are issues they sort out with the experts.'

kimhoh@sph.com.sg

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275761.html

ST Saturday Special Report - What's The Difference (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
translate
What's the difference?
THE ICD-10 (International Classification of Diseases) is a coding of
signs, symptoms, abnormal findings, complaints, social circumstances
and external causes of injury or diseases, as classified by the World
Health Organisation.

In the ICD-10, the definition of TRANSSEXUALISM (F64.0) has three
criteria:

1 The desire to live and be accepted as a member of the opposite sex,
usually accompanied by the wish to make his or her body as congruent
as possible with the preferred sex through surgery and hormone treatment.

2 The transsexual identity has been present persistently for at least
two years.

3 The disorder is not a symptom of another mental disorder or a
chromosomal abnormality.

Dual-role TRANSVESTISM (F64.1) has three criteria:

1 The individual wears clothes of the opposite sex in order to
experience temporary membership in the opposite sex.

2 There is no sexual motivation for the cross-dressing.

3 The individual has no desire for a permanent change to the opposite sex.

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275760.html

ST Saturday Special Report - Trans Singapore (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
Trans Singapore
A new study suggests that there are at least 1,500 transsexuals in
Singapore, higher than previously thought. They come from all kinds of
socio-economic backgrounds, and many - debunking stereotypes of lowly
educated sex workers - are high-earning professionals in both the
corporate and public sectors. The majority prefer to lead invisible
lives because transphobia is still very prevalent in Singapore.
By Wong Kim Hoh
A DEGREE from Curtin University, Western Australia, and a regional
management position in a large logistics organisation.

While laudable, Juliet's achievements are not likely to make most
people sit up and take notice.

Until, of course, the 40-year-old tells them she is a transsexual.

'When you say transsexual, a lot of people immediately think of Changi
Village and Desker Road,' she says, referring to two of Singapore's
most notorious vice haunts.

'People harbour so many stereotypes. Not all of us are prostitutes. In
fact, a lot of us lead and want to lead very normal lives,' says the
articulate professional whose company and colleagues know of her status.

Transsexuals - people who do not identify with the gender they are
born in and sometimes change their bodies through surgery or hormone
therapy - in Singapore have Bugis Street to blame for this albatross
hanging around their necks.

Before it made way for urban development in the mid-1980s, the street
- and nearby Johor Road - was world-famous for its transgendered
denizens peddling their bodies for profit.

The stereotype still dogs Juliet and members of her community,
although many hold down respectable jobs in law firms, engineering
companies and government departments.

They live with many other tags, including widely held beliefs that
they are mentally sick and sexually deviant.

Make-up artist Lynette Leong aka Ginger, in her 30s, says the
community has to put up with many derogatory names, including ah kwa
and bapok.

The Singapore Polytechnic graduate, who has a diploma in mechanical
engineering, says: 'Even the Chinese newspapers describe us as ren yao
(human monsters). How can society accept us when they perpetuate this
nonsense?'

Not surprisingly, many transsexuals choose to live their lives as
privately as possible. This makes it hard to determine how big the
community is.

In 1988, psychiatrist Tsoi Wing Foo - Singapore's foremost authority
on the subject - carried out a study on the prevalence of
transsexualism in the country.

That study suggested that the prevalence rate for male-to-female (MTF)
transsexuals was 1 in 2,900, and female-to-male (FTM) transsexuals, 1
in 8,300.

However, a new statistical study by two renowned researchers last year
indicated that the rates are higher.

Using data from Dr Tsoi's study, Professor Femke Olyslager from Ghent
University and Professor Lynn Conway from the University of Michigan
extrapolated that the MTF prevalence here is 1 in 2,000, and FTM, 1 in
4,000. This means the little red dot is home to at least 1,500
transsexuals.

Singapore was once famous for sex reassignment surgery (SRS), thanks
to the late Professor S.S. Ratnam who did the first one in the then
Kandang Kerbau Hospital in 1971.

About 1,000 SRS were performed here until 1987 when the authorities
asked hospitals to phase them out for fear that hospital staff might
be exposed to Aids. The objection was lifted in 2001. By then, cities
like Bangkok and Seoul had overtaken Singapore as an SRS hub.

Currently, the National University Hospital still offers such
operations. Professor A. Ilancheran, a senior consultant in the
department of obstetrics and gynaecology, says the hospital has
performed 15 in the last five years. It costs between $8,000 and
$9,000 for an MTF operation, and from $15,000 for an FTM one.

Compared to many other Asian countries such as Malaysia and Thailand,
Singapore has fairly enlightened laws about transsexualism. It has
allowed transsexuals - who have undergone SRS - to change their gender
on their identity cards since the 1970s, and to marry since 1997.

These legal provisions, however, have done little to banish
discrimination against transmen and transwomen.

In 2005, someone named Javier put up an online petition for SBS
Transit to ban transsexuals on buses the way they ban animals.

Last year, Singapore's most famous transsexual Leona Lo was denied
entry to a Clarke Quay nightspot which did not welcome 'ladyboys'.

Indeed, all the 15 or so transsexuals interviewed by The Straits Times
have experienced transphobia socially, at work and even in the family.
Almost all of them have attempted suicide because they cannot cope
with the rejection.

Mr Daniel Kaw, 36, who founded sgbutterfly.org, a resource portal for
transsexuals, says: 'I see scars on the wrists of many of the
transsexuals I know. They've gone through the kind of sadness that you
and I will never understand.'

Rare are the likes of Juliet, Ginger and Leona who have stepped
forward to dispel the 'culture of shame' enveloping their community.

Several of those who spoke to The Straits Times wanted to go public,
but were dissuaded by their families or fear that they would lose
their jobs.

Ignorance surrounding the condition is one of the main reasons why
transsexualism is a taboo subject in Singapore society. Dr Tsoi, 75,
who has counselled more than 700 transsexuals over three decades, says
many people do not know that transsexualism is a medical condition,
not a sexual perversion.

The main symptom is dysphoria, an intense feeling of anguish and
anxiety about having been assigned the wrong sex at birth. To seek
relief, many transsexual persons 'transition' - through surgery and/or
hormones - and begin to live their lives in their target genders.

Before SRS, transsexuals here have to be evaluated by two
psychiatrists, and undergo RLT (real-life testing) where they have to
live and dress as their target gender.

Almost all the transsexuals interviewed by The Straits Times say their
families reacted harshly when they outed themselves.

The father of civil servant Ivan (not his real name) threatened to
disown him and did not speak to the 24-year-old for over two years
after his SRS.

S.L., a 37-year-old MTF regional manager for a public-listed education
company, was thrown out of the family home. At least three other MTFs
were beaten up by brothers and/or fathers.

Many of them underwent their SRS without their family's blessings.
Ivan - who has two older sisters - did it in Bangkok last year,
accompanied by a friend.

After the operation, the surgeon handed him his removed womb. 'I
thought: 'I will never have children' and I remember feeling really
sad and alone.'

Psychiatrist Calvin Fones, 37, counsels about 30 transsexuals each
year. He says: 'Most parents have dreams for their kids, and normal
dreams include them having their own family and children.'

The working world is even more unforgiving.

Ivan, a National University of Singapore arts graduate, applied for a
teaching job last year. Even though he already had his gender changed
in his identity card, he came clean when asked why he did not do his
national service.

'They then asked if I would influence my students because of what I
am,' he says. He did not get the job, and is now an administrative
officer.

Leona, 33, says transsexuals often have to lie about their NS status,
or whether they have gone for operations, when filling up employment
forms.

'That's why I decided to strike out on my own. I am hired and can hire
on my own terms,' says the entrepreneur who owns a public relations
agency, Talk Sense.

Five years into her job as a regional manager, S.L., who holds a
master's degree in sociology from the University of Wollongong in
Australia, says her employer has no inkling she used to be a man.

'I've worked too hard to get where I am. I can't risk coming out
because I know it will jeopardise my career,' she says. Her paranoia
stems from an unpleasant experience. She used to be the operations
manager for a local restaurant and oversaw its expansion from one to
four outlets.

Her decision to 'transition', however, had dire consequences. 'One
day, when I was on leave, a letter was delivered to me, telling me I
need not report for work the next day,' she says.

Juliet, too, knows the odds that are stacked against transsexuals in
the marketplace. To get hired, she went for no fewer than 60 interviews.

'Many times, I could tell that the interviewers thought I was suitable
for the job.'

But when she told them about her sexuality at the end of each
interview, suddenly 'their faces would change'.

Fortunately, Fanny Ler, 34, fared better. Several months ago, the
administrative assistant sent out 60 resumes, all of which made clear
she was a transitioning MTF.

She got three interviews, and was offered a job by a construction
company which picked her over 50 others.

Her employer Betty Oh, 43, says: 'No one would want to do what she did
if they had a choice. I picked Fanny because she had the relevant
experience. I'm not paying her a free wage. She has to do her work,
which she has done very well.'

But Fanny, who was once married and has a daughter, is not too hopeful
that she would fare as well in love.

While they have heard of cases of happily married transsexuals, those
interviewed, particularly the MTFs, say finding a partner here is near
impossible.

Leona - who will be giving a talk on transsexualism at the Pelangi
Pride Centre at 9, Kreta Ayer Road on Oct 11 - says she has yet to
meet a local man who dared to date her publicly. Juliet, meanwhile,
echoes the sentiments of many when she says: 'Many men just want money
and sex from you.'

The FTM cases seem to fare better.

Dr Fones says: 'Women tend to look less at the physical and overtly
sexual attractions. Many can be happy with FTMs as emotional partners.'

The Straits Times knows of several FTM transsexuals who have become
happy husbands. But none was willing to give his real name or be
photographed.

'We've gone through too much to get here, we can't risk compromising
our happiness,' says businessman Andrew (not his real name), 45, who
has been married for over a decade.

Juliet understands. She says: 'Many transsexuals are afraid of losing
the comfort zone they fought so hard to get.'

The feisty woman adds: 'I was paranoid too, but now I guess I just
want to do what's right.'

kimhoh@sph.com.sg

http://www.straitstimes.com/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275758.html

ST Saturday Special Report - Goddess of the Third Gender (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
Goddess of the third gender
IN INDIA, the Bahuchara Mataji is the patron goddess of the famed
hijras. Also known as the third gender, they include transsexuals,
transvestites, hermaphrodites and eunuchs.

Wikipedia and several websites such as TranSpiritual.com throw up many
myths surrounding the goddess' origins. One says she was a princess
who castrated her husband when she found out that he preferred
cross-dressing in the forest to jumping in their bed.

Another suggests she was a princess who jumped into a temple pond and
emerged a prince.

Yet another has her as a woman who, when threatened by rapists in the
forests of Gujarat, sliced off her breasts. She said she would offer
them to the attackers if they did not touch her.

She died, and was reincarnated as a goddess. She would appear before
impotent men and command them to cut off their genitals and become her
servant. If they did not, they would become impotent for their next
seven lives.

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275766.html

ST Saturday Special Report - Yearly Revelry to Worship Goddess (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
transfixed
Yearly revelry to worship goddess
By Wong Kim Hoh
THE muted sounds of animated chatter reverberate along the corridor on
the ninth floor of the Crystal Lodge Hotel in Port Klang.

The door of room 989 opens, letting out a heady scent of perfume,
incense and jasmine. A portly matron in a blue sari dashes out,
hairdryer in hand, and frantically races down the passageway.

Inside, confusion reigns.

Seven transsexuals in various states of undress create cacophony as
they beaver away at the business of making themselves beautiful. They
have enough gold and bling on them to light up Little India.

Saris in brilliant hues of red, yellow and green are laid out on the
two single beds and draped over chairs. Several big bags - containing
metres of jasmine garlands - sit on the vanity table, alongside an
assortment of make-up and beauty brushes.

In a corner, on a small makeshift altar, sit framed pictures of
several Hindu deities, including the elephant-headed Lord Ganesh and
Lakshmi, the Goddess of Wealth.

The scene is repeated in at least two other rooms along the corridor.

Indeed, for five days each year, the Crystal Lodge and other hotels in
Klang are invaded by hundreds of transwomen from Malaysia and Singapore.

Decked out in their finest, they gather to worship the goddess
Bahuchara Mataji, enshrined in a small temple in this bustling port
town, about 30km west of Kuala Lumpur.

The presiding deity for transsexuals and other members of the
transgendered community, the goddess is often depicted sitting on a
rooster. She has four hands - the upper right hand carries a sword,
the upper left, scriptures. She has a showering of blessings in her
lower right hand, and a trident in the left.

Many myths surround Bahuchara Mataji. One suggests that she was once a
princess who castrated her husband upon discovering that he preferred
dressing up as a woman and going to the forest instead of coming into
their conjugal bed.

In India, Bahuchara Mataji's original temple was built in 1783 in
Gujarat and attracts about 1.5 million pilgrims each year.

The shrine in Klang - situated in the compound of a house - was set up
about 11 years ago by Ms Asha Devi, matriarch of transsexuals in Malaysia.

The 65-year-old transwoman, who underwent traditional castration in
India in 1972, has been visiting the temple in Gujarat annually for at
least two decades.

She set up the shrine so that the closely-knit Indian transgendered
communities in Malaysia and Singapore would have their own place of
worship too.

The occasion is not only an opportunity for them to worship, but to
bond and celebrate their uniqueness.

The scale of the festival has grown over the years, and now draws even
Indian transsexuals who have settled abroad. This year, at least three
of the devotees returned from Switzerland and Germany for the
celebrations.

The festivities last five days but reach fever pitch on the fourth.

In the morning, a whip-wielding priest leads a procession of at least
100 transsexuals - dressed in green saris - from a nearby shrine to
the temple. They carry urns of milk and earthen pots of fire as
offerings for the goddess, walking in unison to the heady din from a
group of musicians working the tabla, cymbals and clarinet.

The rhythms hit a frenzy as the procession reaches the temple. Several
devotees start to go into a trance, prompting fellow worshippers to
restrain them.

Some manage to break free, yelping and rolling up their eyeballs
before throwing themselves to the floor. They writhe like serpents
with their tongues sticking out. Others bow before the shrine,
chanting prayers as priests start bathing the goddess with the urns of
milk.

More elaborate rituals take place in the evening. With much fanfare,
the deity is borne aloft in a gaily-lit float which winds its way
around the town centre. The four-hour procession, which attracts a
huge crowd of devotees and onlookers, is the highlight of the
festival. Half a dozen whistle-blowing security officers clear traffic
and maintain crowd control.

It is quite a spectacle: hundreds of elaborately made-up transsexuals,
dressed to the nines and dripping with jewellery.

Some walk with hands linked. Others break into feisty dances while
balancing pots on their heads, and yet others twirl their colourful
skirts as they execute nifty moves with wooden sticks.

More prayers, riotous dancing and singing take place after the
procession returns to the temple.

It's past midnight.

A gaggle of transwomen with damp hair, streaked mascara and sweat
patches on their saris troop along the corridor on the ninth floor of
the Crystal Lodge.

They open the door to room 989, throw off their dancing shoes, and
take off their make-up and finery to retire for the night.

kimhoh@sph.com.sg

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275768.html

ST Saturday Special Report - Crossover Celebrities (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
transformed: CROSSOVER CELEBRITIES
Making it in the mainstream
SINGAPOREAN transsexual activist Leona Lo has a dream: To become a TV
talk show host.

'If Eunice Olsen can have her own talk show on TV, why can't I?' says
the PR practitioner, referring to the former beauty queen and
Nominated Member of Parliament who currently hosts Rouge.

Leona thinks she is made of the right stuff for the job: decent looks,
gift of the gab and grey matter. After all, she has a degree in
English, as well as a master's in qualitative research from York
University in Britain.

But she is grounded enough to know that the dream is not likely to
come true, not if mindsets and discrimination do not change.

Which is a pity, she says, because transsexuals have made great
strides in showbusiness.

Indeed, they have. They include:

# Candis Cayne: She plays Carmelita, the transsexual mistress of New
York Attorney-General Patrick Darling (William Baldwin) in the TV
series Dirty Sexy Money.

Essentially, the role means that the 1.78m tall actress is the first
transsexual to play a transsexual in prime time.

Born Brendan McDaniel in Hawaii, the classically trained dancer gained
public attention as a female impersonator in popular gay bar Boy Bar
in New York City. She later landed roles in a number of movies
including To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything Julie Newmar; and Stonewall.

She transitioned in 1996 and has a boyfriend, DJ Marco.

# Jin Xing: A former army colonel who became a ballerina,
choreographer and now owner of a contemporary dance company Shanghai
Jin Xing Dance Theatre, in China.

Now 41, she joined the People's Liberation Army at nine, became a
member of the military's dance troupe and worked her way up to the
rank of colonel.

She left for New York to study modern dance in 1987, before travelling
and performing in Europe. She had her sex operation in 1996 when she
was 28, and later went to Shanghai to be a choreographer. She and her
German husband now have three adopted children.

# Rose: The first transgender TV host in India, Rose's talk show
Ippadikku Rose discusses contemporary social issues including
traditions, sexuality and taboos. It is watched by millions in Tamil
Naidu.

The former Ramesh Venkatesan started dressing up as a woman in her
early 20s. Now 28, she used to work as a Web designer in the United
States and has a master's in biomedical engineering from Louisiana
Tech University.

Her family has yet to come to terms with her sexuality.

# Nong Toom: Thailand's most famous kathoey (male-to-female
transgendered person) is a multi-hyphenate: a muay thai champion,
model and actress.

She started learning Thai boxing as a young boy, determined to win
matches to help support her poor parents and fund her sex change
operation.

She came into the public limelight when she was 16. Wearing make-up,
she floored a much bigger opponent in Bangkok's Lumpini Stadium.

She was to win many more matches before retiring in 1999, when she had
her sex operation. She became an actress, nabbing roles in plays and
movies such as Mercury Man.

Theatre and film director Ekachai Uekrongtham turned her life story
into a movie Beautiful Boxer in 2003.

# Abigail Chay: Born Caesar Chay Tuck Kwong, this Anglo-Chinese alumna
became Abigail Chay after sex reassignment surgery at the age of 22.

Her late mother Yau Chung Chii - beloved by Singaporeans as the
McDonald's granny - got the former tutor to audition for TV shows.
That's how she landed up as single, desperate and ugly Aunty Abigail
in the comedy Under One Roof.

Chay has since appeared in other TV series such as Maggi And Me and
The Legendary Swordsman on both Channel 5 and 8, and in movies such as
Money No Enough.

The reed-thin actress came out as a transsexual only in 2006, and
revealed that she got married in her early 20s, only to get divorced a
year later.

WONG KIM HOH

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275765.html

ST Saturday Special Report - A Life of Tribulations, but He Has No Regrets (Sept 6)

Sep 6, 2008
transformed
A life of tribulations, but he has no regrets
FACE TO FACE WITH... JORDAN, branding manager
HIS colleagues and bosses know Jordan (not his real name) as a happily
married fellow with a pretty wife.

What they do not know is that the branding manager was born female. Or
that he and his wife went through many trials and tribulations to be
together.

He has kept his past secret not because he is embarrassed.

'There's nothing to be embarrassed about. I just don't want this to
have an impact on my career,' says the 38-year-old who works for a
training company.

Jordan - who became legally male after undergoing sex reassignment
surgery (SRS) more than 10 years ago - has run into people who know of
his past.

'But no one has exposed me,' he says with a big smile.

The elder of two children born to a civil servant and a housewife, he
knew very early on that he was different.

'The mirror and my body told me otherwise but in all my dreams, I was
always male, never female.'

In Primary 1, he confided in his best friend. Alas, it got back to his
mother who gave him 'the whacking of my life'.

'That was when I knew that what I was feeling was very taboo. From
then on, I learnt not to betray what or how I felt,' he says.

Puberty - with its attendant physical changes - was traumatic. So were
teenage infatuations. However, he never acted on them.

'I could not imagine having a physical relationship when I had the
body of a female,' he says.

When he made it to the National University of Singapore, he felt free
for the first time as he could live the life and wear the clothes that
he wanted.

'That was when the repression of being was lifted,' says the arts
graduate, adding that he took on many male roles in varsity musicals.

After graduating with his basic degree, he started work with a public
relations company.

'I guess it was a last-ditch attempt to be normal. I wore suits with
skirts and really went the whole hog but drew the line at make-up.'

His misery was compounded when a colleague proposed marriage. 'I
really didn't know where that came from,' says Jordan, who then
decided to go back to university to do his honours degree.

By then, he had read up enough on the subject and was convinced he
wanted to undergo SRS after graduating.

He then met his future wife on campus. He shocked himself by telling
her all about himself three days after knowing her.

'I was just drawn to her and I didn't want a relationship to develop
under false pretences.'

She decided to be his girlfriend although she had other suitors.

After graduation, Jordan had his transsexualism confirmed by two
psychiatrists. Not long after, he had his SRS done in Mount Elizabeth
Hospital for about $25,000.

His father was sad; his mother refused to talk to him for a long time.

More challenges loomed ahead.

When his wife's father found out, he hit the daughter he had never hit
in his life, and threatened to disown her and 'ruin' Jordan.

He even got the couple kicked out of the church they went to.

The couple stayed firm and got married, five years after meeting.

Attempts to get a pastor to solemnise their wedding failed. They
finally got married in a ceremony officiated by a Justice of the
Peace. They still go to church.

Jordan says: 'I don't think God makes mistakes. I think he has handled
me differently and he may have a purpose for me, one I don't know and
may not know while I am on this earth.'

Meanwhile, Jordan's father-in-law came around one year after the marriage.

'I think he's sometimes closer to me than to his daughter,' he says,
chuckling.

Life has happily settled now. Children are, however, not on the cards.
His wife told him: 'If they're not yours, I wouldn't want them.'

The branding manager says: 'I owe my wife a great debt of gratitude.'

And, he adds, with great satisfaction: 'We genuinely love each other.'

http://www.straitstimes.com/print/Saturday%2BSpecial%2BReport/Story/STIStory_275764.html

TNP: Poser of 'Third Gender' (Jul 30)

Poser of 'Third Gender'

ACCEPTING ME AS PERSON= OPENING UNACCEPTABLE GATE?

S'porean transsexual mulls over tough question FOR years, Ms Leono Lo knew it was not going to be easy. Asking to be accepted on a personal and human level is in sync with Singapore's vision of an all-inclusive society. But somehow things are different for a sex-change individual.

By Ng Wan Ching

30 July 2007

FOR years, Ms Leono Lo knew it was not going to be easy. Asking to be accepted on a personal and human level is in sync with Singapore's vision of an all-inclusive society. But somehow things are different for a sex-change individual.

The gay debate might have had some airing but what about the Third Gender? Transsexuals cause discomfort because they challenge conventional notions of male and female bodies.

Part man and part woman.

Fear of the unfamiliar spawns fear of such fringe groups and their lifestyles multiplying. Will it destabilise the traditional structure of family here?

Ms Leono Lo is aware of social prejudices and has no antidote to offer.

So she's doing the only thing she can think of - opening up and telling her story so others might see her as a human being.

Ms Lo had known something was different about her since she was 12years old and went by the name Leonard.

She knew she was not a homosexual.

But what was she then?

At 15, she chanced upon a book at the Jurong East Community Library called Cries From Within, co-written by the late Professor SSRatnam who performed Asia's first sexual re-assignment surgery here in 1971.

Said Ms Lo, 32: 'Every word in that book made sense to me. Finally, I had the words to describe how I felt. I read it from start to finish in one sitting.'

Today, she has not only written a book chronicling the stories of 13 transsexuals, My Sisters, Their Stories, but also her autobiography.

HER JOURNEY

The book, From Leonard To Leona, details incidents which marked her journey from manhood to womanhood.

It is published by Select Books and will be out in the first week of September.

She started giving talks this year to help others understand.

'I do this so others may feel that they can live openly too,' MsLo said in an interview with The New Paper on Sunday.

She strikes you as just another woman, from the top of her coiffed head to her slinky outfits, attitude, outlook and slingback heels.

Her life took a turn at 21, while at university in the UK. She threw all caution to the wind and flew to Bangkok alone for the gender-changing operation which turned her physically into the woman she knew she had always been inside.

Her parents had no idea that she was going to have the operation.

Said Ms Lo: 'I was born a woman in a man's body. I only realised something was not right when I discovered I liked boys. But not as a gay man. I liked boys and I wanted them to like me as a woman.'

The realisation of her situation drove her to a desperate suicide attempt when she was serving national service. It was only then that her parents found out.

As an only son, she found that the situation was particularly difficult, and for her parents as well.

They hired an exorcist and monks. She was made to drink 'holy' ashes and pray at the temple.

'It took them two years to accept me for who I am. Now, my mother and I have a normal mother-daughter relationship where we discuss lipsticks and such,' she said.

During national service, the army downgraded her to a clerical position.

But she still had to serve out the 21/2years.

'It was difficult. It helped that I had a boyfriend who was very understanding. We had an innocent relationship - no sex, just holding hands and being together,' she said.

They later separated amicably.

PARENTS' SUPPORT

After finishing her studies in Catholic High and Hwa Chong Junior College, she went to the University of York in the UK to study for a degree in English and literature.

'My parents supported me,' she said.

But in her first year in the UK, she decided she could not live as a man anymore and flew to Bangkok for her sex-change operation.

'I had researched the subject, spoken to the doctor and decided I had to get it done,' she said.

She used the tuition money that her parents had sent her for the air ticket and surgery fees.

'My parents were upset, of course, when they found out. But, ultimately, they forgave me and topped up my tuition money,' said MsLo.

When she flew back to the UK after her operation, she went immediately to see a lawyer to change her name by deed poll.

Then she wanted to change her passport to reflect her new gender status.

'But when I went to the Singapore High Commission to do that, they told me it could not be done without changing my identity card first,' she said.

She had to wait until she next returned to Singapore to get her passport updated.

She does not hide her status from anyone, including the men she dates.

Her employers were wonderful.

Ms Lo started work at the Health Promotion Board (HPB).

Then she joined Hill and Knowlton.

When they promoted her, she decided it was time to quit and start her own business.

'I wanted to be able to speak freely as a transsexual and didn't want that to conflict with my work or compromise my employers,' she said.

That was about three years ago. Today, her public relations company, Talk Sense, which concentrates on healthcare communications, has grown and she is looking to hire people.

Among her clients are HPB and Bayer Schering, a pharmaceutical company.

Apart from her books, MsLo also started a series of talks this year.

Titled 'Dare to be me - breaking free of the culture of shame. A Singapore transsexual woman speaks', the hour-long talk aims to shatter the 'culture of shame' surrounding transsexuals in Singapore.

She has given the talk twice, once at a friend's art gallery and another time to sociology students at the Nanyang Technological University.

RAISING AWARENESS

She also plans to conduct the talk at various Singapore workplaces to raise awareness of transsexualism and gender transitioning in the workplace.

These talks will be conducted for free monthly.

She said: 'Compared to others in the region, transsexual women here are considered lucky in that we are granted legal recognition in our new gender.

'However, this is only the beginning of a journey that is fraught with difficulties because of the 'culture of shame' that still prevents many of us from moving ahead in life and fulfilling our dreams and ambitions.'

The Star Online: Devotees from Malaysia and Singapore fulfil vows to deity for transsexuals (Jul 24)

Tuesday July 24, 2007

Devotees from Malaysia and Singapore fulfil vows to deity for transsexuals

By WANI MUTHIAH

KLANG: The five-day celebrations dedicated to Goddess Bahuchara Mataji, the Hindu presiding deity for transsexuals, ended yesterday in a ceremony that saw some 400 participants from Malaysia and Singapore at a temple in Pandamaran near here.

The temple, dedicated to the deity whose main temple is in Shankhalpoor in Gujarat, India, is owned and managed by the local Hindu transgender community.

The celebrations began last Thursday with the highlight on the third day when devotees fulfilled vows by carrying pal kudam (milk pots) and thee chatti (earthen pots with fire).

Dressed in green sarees, the official colour for Bahuchara Mataji, the entourage, led by the community’s matriarch M. Asha Devi, 63, carried the pal kudam and thee chatti to the temple.

Two devotees balancing milk pots as they enter the temple at Pandamaran last Saturday.
This was followed by a chariot procession in the evening with Pandamaran assemblyman Datuk Dr Teh Kim Poo as the event’s special guest.

Asha Devi said preparations for the celebrations began several months ago, as arrangements had to be made to accommodate the devotees.

“Devotees also prepare themselves by fasting for at least three months before carrying the pal kudam and thee chatti,” said Asha Devi, who runs a food outlet in Kuala Lumpur.

According to her, a flag bearing the Goddess’ emblem was raised on the first day followed by an ubayam (special prayers) on the second day.

“The fourth day was also observed with prayers for Mataji. On the final day, which is today, we have special prayers for a male deity known as Veera Vetai Karar Muniandy followed by anathanam (feeding of the masses),” she added.

Meanwhile, S. Komathi, 50, who cooked for the devotees, said this year’s event was special as they were praying hard to obtain a piece of land from the state government to build a proper temple.

“The temple is currently situated in the home of one of our members’ grandmothers. Due to space constraints we cannot do any renovation,” said Komathi who owns a flower shop in Klang.

Komathi said the community badly needed a bigger temple to accommodate the crowd.

“In the past, it was only our community which prayed here but now others are also coming to the temple.”

For K. Janani, 27, who came all the way from Singapore to carry the pal kudam, the event was both fun and colourful.

“I like the festive atmosphere. I have been coming here for the past two years to offer prayers as our community does not have a dedicated temple in Singapore,” Janani added.

AP: Transsexual drug dealer spared the cane (Jan 22)

Transsexual drug dealer spared the cane
Associated Press
published Sunday, January 22, 2006

SINGAPORE -- A court has spared a Thai transsexual drug dealer from caning because Singaporean law does not allow women to be sentenced to that punishment, a newspaper reported Friday.

Thai prostitute Mongkon Pusuwan, who underwent a sex change from male to female a decade ago, was instead sentenced on Wednesday to six years in jail after a medical report concluded that she was a woman, The Straits Times reported.

District Judge Bala Reddy handed down the sentence after the long-haired Mongkon, 37, pleaded guilty to charges including trafficking in cocaine and tablets containing ketamine, the report said.

The amount of drugs in her possession was too small for her to qualify for Singapore's mandatory death penalty for some drug cases.

Mongkon, whose passport identified her as a male, was arrested in December.

Men who commit similar crimes can be sentenced to caning. Offenders are strapped to a wooden frame and lashed across the bare buttocks with a rattan rod.

The punishment drew international attention in 1994 when American teenager Michael Fay was caned for spray-painting cars, despite objections from then-U.S. President Bill Clinton.

ABC: Singapore's first transsexual beauty pageant a sell-out success

Singapore's first transsexual beauty pageant a sell-out success

Singapore's first major transsexual beauty pageant was held over the weekend to raise money for the poor, with the event's organisers hailing it as a ground-breaking, sell-out success. An audience of 1,350 people watched 13 finalists compete for the title of Miss Tiffany Singapore, based on the famous Thai contest of the same name, at the city-state's biggest in-house restaurant.

Thirty-three Singaporean transsexuals originally entered the contest, including one national serviceman, according to the organiser, Mogan Aruban. Mogan, who is the chairman of non-profit charity organisation Singapore Amalgamated Services Cooperative, told AFP the contest reflected an increasing tolerance in famously conservative Singapore. "This was a ground-breaking event considering the whole family values thing (of Singaporean society)," Mogan said.

"I think it's acceptable now because the Prime Minister has said we have to liberalise and among the younger generation there are so many gays." Former prime minister Goh Chok Tong said last year that gays would be allowed to work in the civil service as part of the Government's loosening of social controls, however homosexual acts are still illegal. Mogan said he had been staging more traditional fund-raising events, such as dance competitions and functions featuring international celebrities, over the past 15 years but Miss Tiffany was the most successful.

AFP: Singapore's first transsexual beauty pageant a sell-out success (Sep 26)

Singapore's first transsexual beauty pageant a sell-out success

Posted Sun Sep 26, 2004 6:17pm AEST

Singapore's first major transsexual beauty pageant was held over the weekend to raise money for the poor, with the event's organisers hailing it as a ground-breaking, sell-out success.

An audience of 1,350 people watched 13 finalists compete for the title of Miss Tiffany Singapore, based on the famous Thai contest of the same name, at the city-state's biggest in-house restaurant.

Thirty-three Singaporean transsexuals originally entered the contest, including one national serviceman, according to the organiser, Mogan Aruban.

Mogan, who is the chairman of non-profit charity organisation Singapore Amalgamated Services Cooperative, told AFP the contest reflected an increasing tolerance in famously conservative Singapore.

"This was a ground-breaking event considering the whole family values thing (of Singaporean society)," Mogan said.

"I think it's acceptable now because the Prime Minister has said we have to liberalise and among the younger generation there are so many gays."

Former prime minister Goh Chok Tong said last year that gays would be allowed to work in the civil service as part of the Government's loosening of social controls, however homosexual acts are still illegal.

Mogan said he had been staging more traditional fund-raising events, such as dance competitions and functions featuring international celebrities, over the past 15 years but Miss Tiffany was the most successful.

ST: He's a woman... she's a man--Leslie Lung wrestled with sexual issues all his life.

He's a woman... she's a man--Leslie Lung wrestled with sexual issues all his life.

The ex-transsexual also sold his house and spent $200,000 to produce his own book on sexuality

by Wong Kim Hoh
There is something soft about Mr Leslie Lung. It is evident in the slight sway of his hips as he walks, and the gentle lilt in his voice. 'A lot of people who see me today will think I am effeminate,' the 39-year-old says matter-of-factly over coffee in Holland Village. 'But they should have seen me then.' Then was more than two decades ago, when he wore more than just the bangs which now frame his youthful face. He had long lustrous locks and a wardrobe full of heels, dresses and accessories. The ex-transsexual has thrown the dresses - together with a few skeletons - out of his closet.

Religion, he says, was his saviour. He has abandoned plans for a sex operation he once almost had. And although he admits to still feeling sexually attracted to men, he claims to have been celibate for the past 19 years. His road to self-acceptance has been rocky, but it culminated in a book, one which cost him two years of his life and more than $200,000 from his savings to write, produce and publish. But more about that later. Nineteen years of celibacy, I suggest as gently as I can, is a notion which beggars belief.

Mr Lung, who runs a creative consultancy company, squirms shyly in his seat and lets out a soft laugh. 'Well, I'm really not in any physical relationship with anyone,' he says. 'Chastity is a word we all hate. But I see it as being responsible to myself. I have made a choice and whether I find women or men attractive is irrelevant.' He adds, with a shrug: 'I have a support group to thank. When I get the urge, I talk about it and find resolution and move on.

Sex is so over-rated and yet, the irony is, it is so important.' He should know. He has been struggling with sexual issues all his life. He was born the only son of a pharmaceutical-company manager and a housewife. He has a 43-year-old sister who is a youth worker in Thailand. 'My Dad did a lot of travelling and I grew up deprived, not financially but emotionally,' he says.

In his mellifluously articulated English, he adds that he 'was not predisposed towards games or rough and tumble play' and was often bullied by primary-school mates for being soft. In his secondary 'all-boys missionary school, can guess which one, right?', he was often hauled up for having 'long hair and putting on make-up'. He struggled with himself and with his friends. 'I tried to be more manly, and suppressed my feelings and liking for art, dance - very narrow definitions of what makes a man - but I was miserable. I didn't feel like a man so how was I going to live as one? 'I was already considering a sex change when I was 12 or 13. My disciplinary master referred me to professional help and I actually went through all the proper channels. I saw a social worker, a psychologist; I read a lot of magazines.'

Over three years of counselling and professional diagnoses confirmed what he had long known - he was a transsexual, that is, he felt he was a woman trapped in a man's body. He did not involve his parents at first: 'They knew, I guess, but they never talked about it. They could see what was happening.' By the time he enrolled as a business administration student in a local polytechnic, he already had a closet full of dresses. He decided on the inevitable after graduation in 1984 - sex surgery.

But like a dramatic Hollywood script, he claims to have had an epiphany three days before he was due in the operating theatre - on a Good Friday, as it turned out. 'One of the key thoughts of the Bible is that a man shouldn't put on woman's clothes. I've always thought that ridiculous but suddenly I saw the principle behind the commandment. God is telling us not to do the opposite. Suddenly I knew that the operation would not be right,' he says. He decided to fulfil his national service obligations and confront his fears of more taunting and bullying face-on.

Turning Point
'I could have found a way out of NS because of my circumstances but to do so would be going against every aspect of my decision to be true to myself. I was really trying to discover who I was as a person, and gender was just part of it.' The next turning point came in 1991 when he met Mr Synclair Rogers, an American pastor who came out of transsexualism to become a husband and a father. The latter also started a ministry called Choices In Singapore to help people with sexual issues.

Mr Lung attended Mr Rogers' self-help support group. The people he met inspired him to embark on yet another tumultuous chapter in his life - to be author, producer and publisher of a book. 'The people I met wanted to talk about their sexual issues openly as they found resolution, and I thought it would be timely that such a book - frank, no-holds-barred - be written.' No publisher would touch the project so he wrote and published Freedom Of Choice, a collection of 20 true accounts of people triumphing over sexual struggles.

The project, which was published in 2000, took over seven years. It was a baptism of fire, one which saw him nearly buried under an avalanche of publishing, legal and distribution problems. He had to give up his lucrative design business to do the project full-time, and even sold his Housing Board flat in Dover Road to finance it. The exercise cost him more than $200,000 and a lot of tears: 'I was very mindful of the fact that people would say that I am exploiting people's stories to make a quick buck.' To silence these detractors, he donated all proceeds, amounting to $70,000, to three social-service agencies, from the sale of 500 hardcover copies of the book.

'People who were not gay accused me of promoting a gay lifestyle. Militant gays, on the other hand, accused me of being anti-homosexual,' he says with a sigh. 'But as the title suggests, the book is about freedom of choice. We're free to choose, and we can choose to be free from whatever constrains us. 'And if that means an alternative lifestyle for some people, then power to them,' says the author, who also gives talks on sexuality in secondary schools here.

Frustration
There have been uplifting moments though. 'When I explained what I was doing to many of my clients, they rallied around me. They gave me props, made contributions, provided me with information,' says Mr Lung who has revived his agency. Its list of clients include Apple Computers, Asia Pacific Breweries and HBO Asia. Ruefully, he admits that he has sold only half of the 7,000 copies of Freedom Of Choice. The lack of publicity did not help; publications avoided reviewing it because of its controversial nature. 'I was in the PR business, I did press releases for my clients but I couldn't get any mileage for my own work. I was so frustrated,' notes Mr Lung, who lives alone in a Normanton Park apartment.

Would he do it all over again? He laughs and says: 'I hate that question because you can't know the answer. You can't live your life again.' There is a quiet dignity about him. He is obviously religious but he does not proselytise. People who do not know him, he says, 'don't know what I am all about. But we need to challenge our notions of sexuality as far as manhood or womanhood is concerned. Are women really from Venus and men from Mars?' He gives his parting shot: 'If you ask me, we're all on Planet Earth. But we are all different, we are who we are. And this is what I am.'

Timeasia.com: Boys will be girls (2001)

Boys Will Be Girls
In a Bangkok clinic, $1,000 can turn a man into a woman. Some call that the price of freedom
By DAFFYD RODERICK Bangkok

When Chittarika Kijboonsari woke up in the recovery room with a vagina where her penis used to be, she had no regrets. "I woke up smiling. I'd wanted it cut off for so long, it was just a relief to finally look like a woman where it matters most," she says. The doctor did that by splitting the penis up the middle and using the flesh from the scrotum and the root of the penis to mold a labia and clitoris. All that was left to do was go home and break the news to her mother. "She didn't speak to me for three months," Chittarika recalls. "She was scared. She thought I had bad spirits inside me. And then one day she forgave me, she accepted me." Her sisters have as well, welcoming their new sister with gifts of lingerie and makeup. The whole family now cheers her on at transsexual beauty pageants.

The success of last year's smash hit movie Iron Ladies—about a volleyball team comprised of transsexuals—seemed to say to the world that Thailand embraces all. In reality, the film's success owed more to a good storyline than to societal understanding. Although they're not exactly ostracized, transsexuals live on the fringes of Thai society and struggle to be accepted as women. Most of their countrymen believe them to be suffering for bad behavior in a past life.

On Chittarika's identity card her gender—despite her surgery, her little black dress, her long, soft brown hair—is listed as male. Every time an official or employer asks to see it, they find out that she used to be a he. Thai law doesn't allow people to change their gender on identity cards or passports. And yet, Thailand offers people like Chittarika more freedom than most other Asian countries. Singapore and Malaysia push transsexuals much further into the shadows, and the surgery is illegal in Japan.

Nobody knows how many transsexuals there are in Thailand, though some surgeons put the number at more than 10,000. Since there is no official record, there's no telling how many gender change operations are performed every year. But surgery is easily available at a wide range of prices. At the gleaming Bumrungrad Hospital, well-heeled foreigners pay around $6,000 for the works, including breast augmentation and Adam's apple shaving. Some clinics in Pattaya will undo Mother Nature's handiwork for $1,000.

Chittarika knew all along that Nature had made a big mistake. "I wanted to be a girl since before my memory starts," she says, looking entirely feminine in a simple black mini-dress, sipping a frappuccino in Starbucks. Growing up, she played with Barbie dolls and put on her mother's makeup. "In my heart I was a girl, my body just didn't match," she says. Now it definitely does. She does modeling work and appeared on the cover of New Half, a now-out-of-print publication for sao prapet song, "the second kind of woman." The magazine, published by Vanida Koomanuwong, was shut down two years ago by a government policy aimed at limiting media exposure for transsexuals on the premise that they were a bad example for youth. TV shows with transsexual characters—usually used as sassy, obnoxious sidekicks—were told to get rid of the parts. Koomanuwong insists there was nothing vulgar about New Half. It featured real people, with real lives, she says. "People see transsexuals as nasty whores, or as mentally ill, but they're not: they're everyday people."

But while Koomanuwong—who's the first kind of woman, in case you're wondering—advocates for social change, few sao prapet song see any point in being political. Few care to lobby for changes in the rape law, which doesn't cover transsexuals, or for the right to marry. Najaira Lee, a 27-year-old makeup artist, says her biggest concerns are private: whether or not she should tell her boyfriend, an expatriate living in Bangkok, that she used to have a man's body. "Do you think I should?" she asks anxiously. She's not sure her boyfriend would accept her for what she is—and what she was. When she's told men in her past, they've usually become just that, men in her past. Can she risk telling the truth again? "Finding lovers is easy," she muses, "but finding someone who loves you is hard."