I may have HIV. Will you still sleep with me?
Under proposed changes to law, those at risk must disclose sex history to partner
By Ng Wan Ching
September 30, 2007
Tell the truth, says a new legal proposal that seeks to put the onus on those who lead risky sexual lifestyles to come clean with their partners.
Deceive - if there is a possibility that you have been exposed to the Aids virus - and you face up to 10 years in jail and a fine of up to $50,000.
Will such a law be effective in stemming the spread of Aids? Or could it drive people further into secrecy?
Imagine saying before sex: 'I may have been exposed to HIV. If you have sex with me, you should accept the risk of infection.'
Under the Infectious Diseases Act now, a person who knows that he is HIV-infected must inform his partner before having sexual intercourse. His partner must agree to accept the risk of infection.
If he doesn't warn his partner, he's breaking the law.
The Ministry of Health (MOH) is proposing to expand the act to include those who, although unaware that they are HIV-positive, have reason to believe that they have been exposed to the risk of contracting HIV or Aids.
This could be from having unprotected casual sex with multiple partners and prostitutes or sharing needles.
Another condition is that he must have had tested negative for HIV and not had sex or engaged in any risky activity since then.
Finally he must take reasonable precautions during sex, such as by wearing a condom.
Said Mr Benedict Jacob-Thambiah, an HIV/Aids educator: 'Who can be bothered? I think this will drive such people underground even more. Because now you are saying they are potential criminals.'
BLAME GAME?
The proposed laws appear to be more intent on ascribing blame rather than to treat HIV/Aids as a public health concern, said Mr Jacob-Thambiah.
Said Mr Brenton Wong, former vice-president of Action for Aids: 'This is putting the law in the bedroom, but how are the authorities actually going to police it?
'This is saying that if you are morally questionable, then you will get HIV. Only if you remove the stigma and make treatment available and affordable will people come forward.'
Dr Stuart Koe, chief executive officer of Fridae.com and a trained pharmacist specialising in HIV medicines, predicts that the new law will rarely be used.
'It will have minimum impact on HIV in Singapore. I think we could use our resources better,' he said. He thinks that to accuse someone of infecting another person with HIV is a
difficult thing to prove in court.
Said Dr Koe: 'Firstly, the chain of transmission is fairly difficult to ascertain.
'Secondly, if it's between a married couple, usually the wife will not want to prosecute the husband for fear of breaking up the family.'
If the Government is willing to go to the extent of changing the law, he thinks it would be much more helpful to change it to protect HIV individuals from workplace and insurance discrimination.
'We should improve their access to treatment and care rather than further alienating them,' said Dr Koe.
Already, there are fears that there is a hidden HIV epidemic.
A study of more than 3,000 leftover blood samples from public hospital patients early this year showed that one in 350 was infected with HIV.
If accurate, this would mean that Singapore has about 9,000 infected adults, much more than the official figures.
Neither the patients in the study nor their doctors were aware of their HIV status. Also, HIV is now a treatable disease like any other chronic disease.
'With treatment, people have stopped dying from HIV. But that message has not gone out. Instead when people find out they are positive, they go underground and they feel helpless,' said Dr Koe.
But Health Minister Khaw Boon Wan points out he has good reasons for the proposed changes.
Every year, 10 per cent of those newly infected with HIV are women. About half of them are married women whose husbands are HIV positive.
Said Mr Khaw: 'I draw the conclusion that they got it from their husbands.'
These are among the people he wants to protect. The new laws will help the Ministry deal with the minority of people who are sexually irresponsible.
For the majority of people, ABC - abstain, be loyal or use a condom - is good enough.
The minority may need CRT - condom and regular testing.
'If you insist on harming yourself by visiting prostitutes and so forth, then do CRT and inform your sexual partner,' said Mr Khaw.
Three cases have been dealt with under the existing laws.
In 2005, investigations unearthed the case of an HIV-positive foreigner from Nigeria who had unprotected sex with several women in Singapore.
He did not inform them of his status before they had sex. He left Singapore before he could be charged.
Earlier this year, an HIV-positive man did not inform his wife of his status before engaging in sex, using a condom.
His wife, who was a foreigner and unwilling to testify against her husband, tested negative for HIV.
He was fined.
An HIV-positive individual who may have had sexual intercourse without informing his partner of his HIV status is also being investigated.
Will the amendments take it a step further in preventing the spread of Aids?
Yes - but only if honesty is a policy that is practised in bed.
HIV+
2,852 people in S'pore HIV-positive, 25 are kids
HIV+
1,547 people in S'pore have Aids
The Toughest Call: Conversion Therapy
Jennifer Lee Had a Tough Choice to Make When She Found Out Her Husband Is Gay
By ALISON LYNN and MAGGIE BURBANK
Sept. 22, 2007 —
Jennifer Lee thought she'd found the man of her dreams when she met Steve Lee. He was handsome, sensitive and most of all funny.
They quickly fell in love and after Jennifer converted to Mormonism, they married. After a few years, they welcomed a son. Despite their seemingly happy, secure relationship, Steve was hiding a secret, one he'd had since he was 19 years old.
Jennifer was devastated when her husband told her he is gay.
She was suddenly faced with the toughest call she could imagine: should she stay with her husband who has just come out to her or should she leave him? Although the news shocked and upset her, Jennifer decided something could be done.
"I started to convince myself it didn't have to be," Jennifer said, "and I started to convince him it didn't have to be and he agreed."
Steve, a devout Mormon, feared God would not accept him if he were gay. The couple met with their bishop who urged Steve to rid himself of his homosexuality by going through conversion therapy, a controversial program intended to eliminate homosexual feelings. Steve felt he had no choice.
"I wanted to be accepted by God," he said. "I wanted to be loved. That was everything to me. And so I saw no other route."
So every week Steve joined other Mormon men for group therapy. Most conversion therapy involves different forms of behavior modification, attempting to make people straight by having them act straight. Some programs even teach men about stereotypically "male" activities, such as talking about football and changing motor oil. Steve did not find that his experience with conversion therapy was at all therapeutic.
"I would definitely call it brainwashing," he said. "It was an exercise in humiliation."
There is much skepticism surrounding conversion therapy and whether it's even possible to reverse someone's sexual orientation. Most professional health organizations reject the theories behind conversion therapy, and many have even deemed it a potentially harmful "treatment."
Jack Drescher is a psychiatrist in New York and warns that not only is conversion therapy unlikely to work, it can be very dangerous.
"Patients feel more depressed and anxious when the treatment doesn't work," Drescher said. "They blame themselves. Some people became suicidal."
Are Conversions Successful?
The largest faith-based conversion therapy program in the country is Love in Action, which is located in Memphis, Tenn. Eight years ago "20/20" was invited to meet nine participants in the program who were attempting to purge themselves of what they called "homosexual behaviors."
James Serra, one of those men, says he is one of the program's success stories. Serra stayed in the program for three years, and today he's a counselor at Love in Action.
When asked whether he was a gay man or a straight man, Serra answered, "I'm a man, period. And the way I see it, it's a behavior. Homosexual, heterosexual is a behavior."
While Serra admits he is still attracted to men, he emphasizes that he has not acted on those feelings in eight years. Even though he has yet to have a relationship with a woman, he hopes that one day he will get married and have children.
Wade Richards was Serra's roommate when "20/20" visited Love in Action. As a devout Christian, Richards says he was faced with the difficult call of whether to accept his attraction to men or try to change. Despite the time he spent in conversion therapy, he now lives his life as a gay man.
"I believe that a loving God would not have someone go through such a struggle," said Richards.
Big Bucks on Sexuality Conversion
The faith-based movement to convert people's sexuality is a lucrative industry. Last spring the conservative Christian organization Focus on the Family hosted a conference called "Love Won Out" at a megachurch in Nebraska. Parents were encouraged to bring their children to the conference so they could learn the church's take on homosexuality.
In addition to the $60 entrance fee, attendees could purchase books and videos, including a book by John Paulk, former chairman of Exodus International, a network with more than 11,000 affiliated ministries. Claiming to be "ex-gay" for more than a decade and happily married to a woman, Paulk was considered a poster child for conversion therapy.
Then in 2001, "20/20" reported that Paulk was photographed coming out of a gay bar in Washington, D.C. He is still married, but stepped down from Exodus. His book about his own conversion from homosexuality is still being sold.
Like many of the attendees at the "Love Won Out" conference, Steve and Jennifer had hoped that conversion therapy would be effective. After Steve went through a Mormon therapy program, Jennifer made the tough call to stay in the marriage. They subsequently had two more children, but all along, Steve felt painfully trapped.
"There wasn't a 15-minute segment of any day that went by that I did not feel terrible inside my head," Steve said.
After 16 years of marriage, Steve admitted to Jennifer that he had been having a long-term affair with another married man. The couple has now been divorced for four years, and Jennifer has written a book called "My Ex Is Having Sex With Rex."
Jennifer says, in retrospect, one of her biggest regrets in life was to believe that her husband's sexuality could be changed by conversion therapy. She wishes churches would embrace anyone and everyone, but doubts that will ever be a reality.
"In a utopian world, the churches would open their arms and accept everybody in the world for who they are," she said, "but I don't believe that's going to happen."